MANCHESTER, NH – OK, ladies, the search is over. If you’re looking for a datable guy who cleans up “good” and opens doors – and travels with “hot friends,” then look no further. Lulu, a dating app designed for single ladies on the prowl, has identified the most popular guys in every state, and Chris Benoit, 23, a UNH student, is our No. 1 pick.
According to his Lulu app profile, Benoit scored an average score of 8.8 among girls who know him. His positive feedback includes things like #OpensDoors, #AlwaysPays, #SweetToMom, #LifeOfTheParty and #StrongHands.
Of course, every hero has his Achilles heel, and Benoit earned a few negative reviews, things like #OwnsCrocs, #Can’tBuildIkeaFurniture, #TemperTantrums, “ObsessedWithHisMom, and #PornEducated.
The word is out about Benoit’s alleged datability thanks to a Nov. 30 Business Insider story, identifying every top pick on Lulu from every state, based on the positive feedback left by women who actually know the guys. They also assure readers that they contacted every guy to make sure they were “cool” with being outed as the state’s No. 1 pick.
Of course, you can’t believe everything you read – the Business Insider article actually mixed up New Jersey’s top guy, Chris Cheung, with Benoit, and listed Benoit’s age as 22, when it’s listed as 23 on his actual Lulu profile.
The takeaway: Dating in the 21st century is still confusing and a huge game of chance, even with apps that help you weed through the losers. Good luck out there, ladies.