Is Suicide Selfish?

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O P I N I O N

THE SOAPBOX

Stand up. Speak up. It’s your turn.


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Chester Bennington, lead singer of Linkin Park, was found dead July 20 at his home. He was 41.

Screen Shot 2017 03 06 at 6.58.40 PMWith the news Thursday of Linkin Park’s singer Chester Bennington committing suicide, just a few weeks after singer Chris Cornell (Audioslave, Soundgarden) took his life, a new perspective has been floating around the social media multiverse proposing the idea that suicide is not a selfish act.

At a time when words like tolerance and diversity are gaining more and more buzz, I can understand where and why this new perspective is being tossed around.

But make no mistake about it, suicide is selfish and it needs to stay that way.

I suffer from a severe mental illness. Many years ago I attempted to take my life twice within a couple of months. And some days – probably closer to a hundred than fifty over the last year – the notion of how incredibly selfish it would actually be to abandon my children and parents is squarely the reason that I didn’t kill myself.

I’ve been reading how some folks feel that not shaming a person who commits suicide by calling them selfish will help with the stigma that still exists around mental illness… Maybe, but the correlation doesn’t seem to be of significance.

You want to stop suicide, then get rid of the stigma by getting out of the closet regarding your own mental illness. It’s the stigma and judgement and shame that keep the mentally ill and their loved ones silenced from getting help – and sometimes, killing themselves. What will stop stigma surrounding mental illness is when those who suffer – and those who have loved ones that suffer – come out of the closet about what they’re dealing with, and it needs to start with the loved ones.

We are living in a time when a heroin addict gets more sympathy – not to mention federal- and state-level funding – and is treated as a victim more so than a person who is bipolar or schizophrenic. Aside from the “Overnight Walk” groups, the mentally ill are the only minority left with virtually no advocacy and equality movement.

To sum things up, killing yourself, scarring someone by forcing them to remember where they find you dead, it’s crazy selfish. Even if it sounds nice to say that it’s not selfish, prompted by the notion that the rest of us couldn’t possibly imagine the pain that person was in – even with good intentions of hoping that somehow this will help someone in the throes of depression to get help – it’s selfish.

I’m taking a queue from Harvey Milk’s playbook and coming out of the closet about my mental illness, and I hope that you’ll join me to help others who suffer to get the help they need and deserve.  


Beg to differ? Agree to disagree? Submissions to The Soapbox are welcome and encouraged. Just email your submission to robidouxnews@gmail.com, subject line: The Soapbox.


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David Shaw is a proud single dad that enjoys writing for stage, film, and articles that focus on mental health issues, addiction, music, and personal finance. 

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